Wishing Wednesday was over...having to try and stop the ache inside..I've tried to sleep but seems I just close my eyes and I feel the big boy's presence.. It will take me time for sure as Zeke was so much a part of my life.. he was my service dog as well.. he helped me tremendously.. just being there for me and never feeling a sense of being alone with him.. I know it sounds crazy...but if you knew me, you'd understand..
Finally after the most of the night gone I fell asleep..then to wake up at 4:30am and the race began.. Miss Annie is definitely a character and she loves to show it off too.. and my boy Rudy...well he's as loose as a goose as they come..but his disposition is wonderful...he will be fun to work with..once I show him right and left LOL..
Today was hectic with John of the fighting duo.. he had a heart attack from the trauma and thank goodness they were able to control it with morphine.. however he wound up going in to the cath lab and having them check on the stents and they were all open and flowing than goodness...as for the girlfriend Ms Jane.. what a waist..she's in Orlando with her cousin relaxing.. and calls every now and then..big WUP !
Most of the day I did things for John to make sure he was going to be ok.. called his Atty and then made sure his cell phone got up to the hospital as Bonnie was heading there.. then also made arrangements for his place to get cleaned..then answered all the questions from those that wanted to know..
Yes, it kept my mind busy and helped me stop thinking of my empty nest..but it isn't empty..it's gonna get better .. I just have to keep telling myself.. he was here on this earth for the 10 years ..all not great due to the breeder not being honest and caring..but once he was with Robert and I..even though he had so many surgeries..we made his life as comfortable as can be and for that he gave me so much more.. this I will miss his knowing just how I was feeling and I'm telling you .. you could look at him and he could read your thoughts..
Night time is hard as he would be right on the bed and making his funny little sounds and pawing at me for attention..and once the brats were up.. he was really happy LOL.. they were a pain in the butt for him at times and he'd have to put them in their places...he was good at that.. but I think he also whispered in Rudy's ear.. it was Rudy who was gonna have to take over..cause lately Rudy is coming of his own and starting to show signs of being the Big Guy Standing.
Tried to watch a little TV but no go.. just couldn't get into it.. maybe later this weekend..and so it's bed time and I need to attempt to lay down and just let my feelings go.. knowing Zeke is no longer in any pain sure helps...but once his ashes are home .. I'll feel he's where he belongs..
Those traveling Stay Safe and as always God Bless Us All..